Because procrastinating is my best talent

1. The fall is great because it's not hot, but spring is still better because there is no such thing as ragweed then.

2. A good way to clean out your refrigerator is to stop going to the grocery store for a month, then take your car to the shop for three days and then make every last possible creation you can from the can of soup, frozen waffles, and box of noodles you have in your possession. Also, go broke repairing said car, and then spend your last (almost) $35 on a T.M.X.

3. If anyone needs to know about how to purchase insurance, I have just created a fantastic powerpoint slide show that is sure to be quite riveting, as well as earn me an A tomorrow morning.

4. Knowing you get to sleep in your own bed is a really good feeling sometimes.

It was passive aggressive day at Target

Who wants to hear another Target story?
That's what I thought! Everyone!

I mostly vented all this to Missy and Andrew, but I still feel like putting it out there because someday when I have a new job that isn't just total bullshit all the time, I want to be able to look back and remember everything I don't miss.

My "new" boss (she's been there almost three months, and it's not a hard job), seems to lack the ability to ask me to do the stuff that she wants me to do. It's pretty stupid because she's the boss, and doesn't seem to have problems telling other people what to do. I don't know why she can't do that with me. She mentioned something about my attitude towards her talking to me, but I think thats baloney. If you're the boss, and you want something done, you tell the person or you deal with the fact that you didn't ask, so you can't get mad that it isn't done.

That's what I think about when I choose to avoid people I don't like/don't feel like dealing with. Either you suck it up and tell them what you need, or you deal with the consequences of it not getting done. Because most people aren't mind readers, things aren't just gonna happen.

All day yesterday, I knew my boss was going to need help setting a new display in my department. There were two left to get set on Wednesday, and she told me to do one, and she'd do the other on Thursday. I pulled my share of the work, getting the display set and filled, all while working a short shift and taking care of all the other junk that happens during the day.

When I came in on Friday, she hadn't done a damn thing for her end of the deal. So, around 8:30, she said she was going to do it. Fine. I can always find 8 million other things to do, so I busied myself with a bunch of other stuff, had a chat with the store manager about planning for the holidays, and talked to Gerald. All day long, my boss just sort of ignored me, not really saying anything as she walked by (which is usual), and also not really getting anything done on the project. I noticed a mess she started to make, but no real progress.

At 12:30, she left me a post-it on my desk (I was on the phone and I guess she didn't think she could talk to me), telling me to meet her by the new set. I did, and she said, I've been really busy all day, blah blah blah, I'm going to need help. I said, do you want me to set it for you? And she said no, I just need some help getting it done.

How stupid. I knew she wasn't going to get it done, but did she have to wait FOUR hours to ask for help? She is the flipping boss, but apparently I am a scary monster that she is afraid of. Go me.

I wind up setting the entire thing, putting up the new signing, and cleaning up the mess that she made while trying to get it all started. She took two and a half hours to pull the merchandise out of the backroom. It wasn't even that much stuff.

So then it was like 3:30, and we get off at 4. But she wanted to have a meeting, with the other two girls that she is in charge of. I told her we left at 4, and that I had plans. Somehow, though, we wound up being stuck in the conference room with her till nearly 4:20, not getting anything accomplished. It ended when I told her that if she wants something done, it's her job to ask, I don't read minds, and I was supposed to leave, so I am going now. I got up, and left. It was a flippin' Friday afternoon and she thought she could keep us there late just to bitch? Hell no.

She started to just go after me, but I wasn't having it. I can play her little game, too. She is the boss, she needs to make the effort to talk to me and tell me what she needs. If I need something from her, I'll tell her. But that is probably never going to happen, since I can just tell Kathy or Tim. Honestly, I'd be perfectly happy if she just left me and my department alone. I really don't need any help ever, I'd rather just do my thing and leave. I don't care about it, but I don't do stuff for no reason. If she has a plan, she needs to tell me what the hell it is. She really lacks that sort of leadership quality. And I don't have any respect for her. I've been there too long, and seen too many shitty managers, that they really have to earn my respect, I don't just give it away. And she has not done much in the way of convincing me she deserves it.

All this junk going through my head.

I haven't been able to get to sleep very easily lately. I think there is too much junk going through my head, and most of the time I keep thinking about the bad stuff (like that last post, or my aching foot, or whatever).

Also, it probably seems like I'm always pissed off, which, as I hope all of you know, is so not true.

So, here are a few good things about today.
-Gabbing away with Anita at lunch at school (instead of studying!)
-Breezing through my first investments test in like 25 minutes. This is the class I got a D+ in last semester. Things are going much better the second time around, obviously.
-Amazingly yummy coffee from the pony espresso at school. I think Matt said its some new stronger sumatra blend. Whatever it is, I love it.
-Finding out I got a 100% on my first junior level polysci class test. I'm a genius, it's no big deal.
-Seeing Amy at Target and getting to have a brief moment of girly talk, like we used to when I wasn't taking 12 hours and could go see her and the boys.
-Having some folks from a school supply "store" for needy kids come and clear out my overloaded 75% off clearance displays. I'm calling them back tomorrow to come get more. You couldn't believe how many folders we still have. I'm glad kids who will appreciate them are getting the good deals, and not cheap asses from k-wood who can afford to pay full price.
-Getting myspaced by Katie F, from the good ol St. Pete and UA. I was just thinking about her, too, it was all ESP like.
-Getting an email from Nina AND getting to read another survey. Oh silliness.

So yeah, everything is not all so bad. Maybe now I will be able to sleep and not be all restless and not hate the world tomorrow at work.

GRRRR

I need a new job. I've sent out a bunch of applications and I am stalking the career services listing, but I am so close to the edge these days, I can't stand it.

We were trying to close, but all the stupid people decided to shop at 10pm tonight.

First, I really want to punch this one stupid kid where it hurts, badly. He smarted off to me when I asked him to leave, cause DUH the lights were out. Had to ask him twice, and tell him, no, I was not being rude to him, but the store was CLOSED, so he couldn't shop anymore. What sucks the worst is that Kathy agreed with him when he "complained to the manager". WTF? Last time I checked it was part of my JOB to get people out of the store when we closed. Yeah. And he was like 15. I could have taken him, and haven't been that close to punching someone in a long time.

But then, this totally wasted/stoned/crazy dude was still in the CD's, and I asked him to go up front. NICELY. I have this down, and I know I wasn't being rude. THE FLIPPIN LIGHTS ARE OUT. I tried to help him find the cd he wanted, but he was completely incoherent. Then, he yells up to his girlfriend, "this fucking white girl won't let me get the cd." Again, WTF? We didn't have the damn cd and seriously, how the hell does race play into this? Why is it always about race? I wouldn't ever dream of saying to anyone "this black girl is making me leave." It doesn't f-ing matter what color my skin is. The lights are out, we gave three closing announcements, and you can't just figure it out that you should leave?

GRRRRRRR.

I do really hate people in general. They are pretty much all jerks. I would kill for a good month without any contact with people I don't already know and like. It would be amazing.

I shouldn't have waited this long to get new work shoes.

I bought new shoes for work yesterday, finally, because my old ones had been around since the week after Christmas, and had not one, not two, but three types of insoles added to them, and the heels had been completely worn out.

But I think it was too late. Now, I am not the kind of person who has any hypochrondiac-esque traits. Hell, I haven't seen a regular doctor since my senior year of high school. I don't even HAVE a regular doctor anymore, cause that was my pediatrician. I've been to a few random specialists, and of course, the oh-so-fun annual girl exam, but otherwise, I just don't get sick or hurt enough to warrant shelling out the time and money to go to a doctor.

But back to the shoe/foot issue. I think I gave myself a stupid stress fracture with those shitty old NewB's. I googled it and every website concurred with my symptoms. The bottom of my right foot has been hurting for about three weeks now. Nothing too horribly painful, but it's noticibly worse after a long day at work and first thing in the morning.

But I don't really want to go to a doctor because I picked the shitty insurance where I have cheap premiums but a flippin $2300 deductible before they cover ANYTHING. All I get is a lousy fee reduction if I use an in-network doc. Big deal. I'll save like $20 off a $100 visit, and then have to pay straight up for whatever tests or x-rays or bone scans they want to do. I don't know about all that. I don't know if it's worth it. But then again, you only get one right foot. If it actually breaks that would probably be a lot worse.

Eh. Stupid Target. First it was the stress induced heartburn. Then the spider veins. Now it's my damn feet.

I may be losing it.

I have been trying to start my PAGES and PAGES of reading this afternoon for about an hour now. I did everything I could do that didn't involve reading for homework, and now I need to hunker down. But for whatever psychotic reason, I can't concentrate. I just spent way too long completely emptying out my backpack and looking at all my folders and stuff because I can't find my little tab things I use to mark my pages, and for whatever dumb reason, I can't concentrate on reading unless I can mark my page with them like a nutcase or something.

I'd blame it on too much caffeine, but I only had a cup of coffee and half a bottle of tea. That's nothing. In fact, making coffee right now sounds wonderful, but I am afraid it will make me even more insane.

I also can't stand sitting on my crappy futon trying to read for long periods of time. It's moments like this that I consider just going into debt and ordering up a fancy-schmancy Crate and Barrel couch. And white-glove delivery is only $69. But luckily I have amazing self-restraint. I have been coveting that damn thing for about a year. I keep telling myself I have to wait until I graduate and get a real job, and can afford to pay it off quickly, or even save and pay cash.

Either way, I seem to have major problems getting into a studying routine. I'm distracted by everything right now. I've got to get over it.

If you like The Flaming Lips

Rent their totally way cool rockumentary The Fearless Freaks.
You will love it.

I think this post is pretty much for Jerry. If anyone else (besides you Andrew. Duh, it's your movie), likes them too, you should tell me. I will love you more than I already do.
;)

More Metrolink

I'll try to make this one shorter ;)

Now that the new routes are in service, and many bus lines are feeding into the Metrolink stations, I've noticed a severe increase in the number of riders, both on the morning train to school and the afternoon train home. This has been especially bad on the 3:27 train Eastbound, because it's the first of the rush-hour 10-minute interval trains, and the first Eastbound train for 25 minutes (the last one leaves UM-North at 3:02).

I should mention, also, that yes, I'd just as soon wait for the next train at 3:37, but I have to BE at Target at 4:30, and I'm already a late person as is. I can't afford to wait.

Anyway, the problem with this huge crowd is that it just gets bigger and bigger at each successive stop. People don't seem to know what to do, and since this is not a big city with constant rushes like this, no one really knows how to take it in stride. No one goes and stands in the middle aisle, no one gives up their seats for those who might need them more than others, no one opens paths for those getting off, and the people getting on at the stops immediately crowd in wherever they think they can.

It's rough. And at times, slightly scary. People seem cranky and tired and at the moment, hot, and unwilling to be very tolerant.

I thought it couldn't hurt to pass along my feelings to the folks at Metrolink, because I know it's not just a one-time deal, it's happened every Tuesday and Thursday this semester. I also wanted to suggest them moving back the first 10 min. rush hour train to 3:17, to help alleviate things a bit. I mean, one train would really make a huge difference, and it couldn't be that hard, right?

Actually, I imagine scheduling those trains is a logistical feat, even with software simulations, and it would not be very likely to happen, but I figured it didn't hurt to ask.

I wrote the customer service department last night around midnight. I got my first response this morning at 10:30, from a representative who explained how they determine whether or not a train is beyond desired capacity (it's 216 passengers by the way), and that she would forward my comments on.

I got my second response, this time from a person in the scheduling department, at 4 pm. I am totally impressed with their response times. And this guy told me that they were aware of the problem, and looking at switching one of the trains from leaving Shrewsbury to leave Lambert at this time. They think it will benefit more riders, but it is not likely to happen until November.

All new things have kinks to work out, but I really am impressed that the people at Metro actually listened to my issue and gave me realistic and quick answers. AND something is being done. Not because I asked, but still, it's good to know that someone is looking out for the little guy (or girl, as I happen to be).